Part 1: Why Africa?

I can remember the day so clearly. It was a Wednesday evening and I was preparing to close and leave work for the night. And I knew. I just knew. I could not go to law school that fall. Actually it was not even a thought that could be questioned. I knew it as clearly as I know my name. I had to go to Africa. I HAD to go.

It was a feeling that was so strong, so powerful; I do not know if I ever felt anything like it before. In normal circumstances I would have been terrified by such clarity, but on that day I had peace about the situation. It made sense on a level that is not reached often. This thing inside of me was so strong that I had to act on it. That sense that there is something deep in the fiber of your being that you have to do, and if you don’t do it, you will be violating something…or somebody?

It was not a choice to go to Africa. I had to go.

I do not know if you can relate to what I am saying. If you can congratulations we share experiences that do not make sense. If you can not sorry; maybe one day your gut will freak you out while you try to go about living your life. The one area that did terrify me was telling my parents. How do you tell the people who have supported your dream of becoming a lawyer since the age of 8 that you have changed your mind? As I sat in my car in the parking lot after work that day I decided to just bite the bullet and let my mom give me her mind right then and there. She was amazing! I had barely gotten the words out of my mouth before she replied with the two most precious words: I know. My dad was not so easy to win over but he eventually accepted my phase. Somehow everyone I shared it with just knew which saved me the trouble of trying to explain my change to them.

All I can say is that I knew it would be better to try and fail, because at least I would be true to myself.

And the worst thing would be to live wondering “what if?”